TR Robertson — There are some strange laws that have been passed by various agencies in the United States since the beginning of the United States of America. It is hard to imagine the situation that must have occurred to cause some of these laws to be passed. Some of weird laws from different sites on the internet are the result of myths and urban legends that have surfaced in cities across the nation. Many written about are parts of other laws. But many of the laws have existed and have been removed from “the books” and many were removed because of legal challenges to their validity and legality. What is more amazing and hysterical is that many of the laws are still in place and could be enforced if authorities wanted to take the time to do so. Most of the laws were established in specific cities in the states or specific counties. Almost none of them are state laws, but there are a few.
These will give you a chuckle or two, have you shaking your head and allow you to imagine what in the world must have occurred to cause a group of people to advocate and pass the law. Even more fun is to imagine what the punishment must have been if you broke the law. There will be several articles to cover all the states in the U.S. (except California which was covered in a previous article). Part 1 will cover Alabama to the District of Columbia.
- Stink bombs are outlawed.
- Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.
- Impersonating a member of the clergy is prohibited.
- It is illegal to wear a fake mustache.
- You must have windshield wipers on your car.
- You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.
- You cannot chain your alligator to a fire hydrant.
- It is illegal to stab yourself to gain someone’s pity.
- It is illegal to use confetti.
- You cannot give alcoholic beverages to a moose.
- Moose cannot be viewed from an airplane.
- If you kill a moose or any big game animal, you must salvage the meat to be eaten.
- If you get drunk in a bar you must leave.
- No moose are allowed on sidewalks.
- It is illegal to whisper in someone’s ear while they are moose hunting.
- Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time.
- You cannot push a live moose out of an airplane.
- A man can legally beat his wife, but no more than once a month.
- Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
- When being attacked by a criminal or burglar you may only protect yourself with the same weapon the other person possesses.
- Women may not wear pants.
- It is illegal to cut down a cactus.
- Hunting camels is prohibited.
- It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth.
- You cannot cut down cactus.
- It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling.
- You cannot wear suspenders.
- You need a permit to feed garbage to a pig.
- One may not mutilate a rock in a state park.
- You are not permitted to roll or throw any boulders on any public property.
- It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.
- It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building.
- It is unlawful to lend your vacuum to your next-door neighbor.
- It is illegal to go in public dressed in clothes “unbecoming” on one’s sex.
- It is illegal for barbers to give massages to nude customers unless it is for instructional purposes.
- It is illegal to raise or permit a dandelion to grow within the city limits.
- It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep.
- No alcohol can be stored in hotel minibars in anything larger than miniature containers.
- It is permissible to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits except on Sunday.
- People cannot play Scrabble while waiting for a politician to speak.
- You may not educate dogs.
- You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
- A pickle is not a pickle until it bounces.
- It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.
- Silly string is banned.
- Dogs with tattoos must be reported to the police.
- It is illegal to plant a tree in the street.
- It is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25 mph even when going to a fire.
- It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.
- It is illegal for a barber to hum a tune while cutting your hair.
- There can be no horse racing on Good Friday and Easter Sunday.
- It is illegal to get married on a dare.
- You may not sell dead people for money without a license.
- It is illegal to wear pants that are “firm fitting” around the waist.
- It is illegal to fly over any body of water unless one is carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.
- Alcohol may not be served in nightclubs if dancing is occurring on the premises at the same time.
- You cannot tailgate or otherwise picnic around your car between midnight and 6 am.
- It is illegal to whisper in church.
District of Columbia
- It is illegal to post a notice in public which calls another person a coward.
- It is unlawful for small boys to throw stones at any place in D.C.
- Illegal to wear a ski mask while committing a crime.
- It is illegal to marry your mother-in-law.
- You cannot dance, sing, or whistle in front of any “public convenience station”.
- You cannot race, dance, or participate in any other contest for longer than 12 hours in a 24-hour period.
- You cannot dance in front of the Jefferson Memorial.
- You cannot hire men to dance with other men.
- You can get a parking ticket for parking in your own driveway.
- It is against the law to disseminate a false weather report.
- No boxing event can be held against other sexes.
Every state has or had unusual laws which effected the lives of many people over the years. There are a few more laws than the ones listed, but you get the idea, some strange situations have occurred which some people in authority felt needed a law. The next article will start with Florida.